The history of this picture is a story about the ways of one soul. About the way of struggle and chains of obligations, about the way "I must." Or the way of inspiration and creation, the way of "I can". How do we determine which way to take? We define this when - at the crossroads - we choose to act out of love or out of fear.
The way out of fear is the way of imitation, obedience, slavery - it is always a story about the way to the archetype of the "loving father" which could not be reached. When the family, society, culture does not recognize us as individuals, as alive, when they reject our otherness. When we are loved as obedient, as slavish. And are not loved as wild, free, uncomfortable. We think that by killing our feelings, our dreams, we will become close, we'll become loved. We learn to betray ourselves. But this story is a story of conditioned love which actually is a lack of love, its replacement by manipulation and a desire for power over another one. Objectification of the object of love and reducing it to the function of bringing one satisfaction. If you kill yourself to be loved, there is nobody to be loved — you are dead.
We strive for success, strive for goals, we strive to be good. We are sure that no one needs us as we are. And along this path we serve our fear of loneliness instilled in us by manipulators and narcissistic tyrants on the way. Narcissistic parents, narcissistic cultures. Murdered souls. Enslaved lives, in the eternal pain of loneliness and emptiness, filled with things, addictions, numerous one-day bonds. Black holes inside people screaming about pain.
Such a narcissistic figure, an archetype containing fathers, grandfathers, and culture, is represented in the upper right part of the work. The hero strives for him, longs for his love and blessing for life. And the figure seems to be in contact with him, accepts him, touches his forehead. But below on the canvas we see that it helps the hero to put a knife through his heart and kill himself. And the soul, feelings (the fiery zone of feelings in the picture, the red triangle) is covered with an offset grid of conditioning. You are no more, you killed yourself, erased yourself to be loved. But the meeting will never happen. Love has never been here and never will be. You were never important or needed, you were never even seen. Someone wanted you to satisfy himself; you were an object. And you understand this somewhere inside yourself, somewhere in the icy crystals of your consciousness.
Ritual suicide is the road irrigated with blood and the path to a dream turned into a path of flight from fears. And you run until you die. Lonely, exhausted, betraying yourself and receiving in return only a statement of your slavery.
If someone demands a sacrifice for love - watch, do not look away - there is no love. Look straight, die of grief, bury yourself, wear mourning as long as you need. And then, when you are ready, be reborn from the ashes and go the other way. This new way is reflected at the bottom of the picture. It has always been under your feet. This is the path leading from the Garden of Eden, of plenty and love to clouds of dreams, accomplishments and creative heights. And you say "I can." And you refuse to be a "must." And you free yourself and bless yourself, refusing to die for love and sacrifice yourself.
Introduction to the Series: "Shadows" is an evocative exploration of the collective transformation and the profound challenges faced by humanity during times of existential crisis. Through a series of oil-on-canvas masterpieces, the artist delves into the depths of the human experience, inviting viewers to contemplate the shadows that dwell within and without.
The Journey of Self-Discovery: In the first piece, "Who Am I?" viewers are confronted with the enigmatic interplay of light and darkness, symbolizing the existential quest for identity and purpose. This serves as a gateway into the collective psyche, where individuals and societies grapple with questions of meaning and belonging amidst the chaos of transformation.
Confronting the Shadows of the Past: Through this series, viewers are invited to confront the shadows of the past and explore the barriers that prevent us from expressing our deepest truths. The interplay of light and darkness serves as a visual metaphor for the complexities of the human experience, inviting viewers to navigate the tumultuous journey of self-discovery and collective transformation.
Finding Healing: Through the interplay of light and darkness, "Shadows" series illuminates the universal truths that define the human experience. It invites viewers to confront their shadows and emerge stronger, wiser, and more compassionate beings, ready to embrace the dawn of a new era in human history.